Ingerlund

Quick question – did anybody else come down suddenly with a horrible. horrible cold (or other affliction) as of yesterday?

I’m just thinking – it’s a bit much of a coincidence that on the same day of a “fairy-tale event” – I happen to get hit with a monster of a cold.  Innit?  I smell a witch somewhere.  But now I have to ask – which side of the fence is this witch on?  Is there some bitter twisted hag out there who cursed all the folk in England yesterday – thereby accidentally catching me?  Or is the Baroness of Carrickfergus herself a wicked witch – who cursed me for not being part of the masses who lined the streets or watched excitedly for the first glimpse of her dress?  (Speaking of which – wearing white?  Puh-lease!)

In either case – I vote for a good old fashioned witch-hunt, followed by a burning at the stake.  Or – is a fiery car-crash the modern equivalent… MI6?

What I did on ANZAC Day:

• Watched american television/movies
• Drank Italian wine, ate french escargot – all at a british pub named after an english poet

Mitigating factors:

• When I ordered the wine, I was expecting the Nobilo as per wine list.
• I’d read an article about the French town of Le Quesnoy – so the escargot thing was kinda justified.  Yeah?
• I live in England – so don’t really have much choice about going to british/english pubs.  And I will stand by my decision to walk 30 seconds and sit in the sun outside the Shakespeare, rather than tube/walk 15 minutes to stand in a dark/dingy Walkabout.
• The american movies were (mostly) classics, and the television (mostly) selected high-quality.  Rear Window, however – what up with that?  Supposedly one of the best movies ever.  Yep – pretty sweet movie, and noticeably nice movie-making – even to my naive eye.  But that ending.  Not particularly happy.  Was it forced upon them by the film company?  I realise that this was before the days when movies had to have some kind of ‘question’ being asked, or whatever – but still, the whole thing seemed purpose-built for a look into a voyeuristic society, with symbolism of cameras and what-not through-out.  And then came the twist/not-twist/whatever-that-was.  Dumb.

I thought the unreasonable amount of rage I felt towards co-workers during my first two days back was due to jet-lag, and would subside once I had settled back into normal routine.  It turns out – my normal routine consists of quite a lot of unreasonable rage towards co-workers.  Add that to the considerable amount of completely reasonable disdain of co-workers, and my normal routine isn’t particularly conducive to good mental health.

So – what I’ve gone and done is just book another excursion.  So – for all of those lucky enough to live in the much better ‘Southern’ hemisphere – here’s some dates when you should allow for activities as varied as: having a bed ready for me to sleep in; cooking dinner for me; organising a venue for a meal and/or social drinks; attending a meal and/or social drinks; visiting me; having meals cooked by me; lazing about; swimming; diving; chit-chat; and other stuff…

• Saturday 14th May -> Monday 16th May – Sydney.  Probably primarily hanging in/near Pen’s flat in Manly, recovering from lack of sleep.
• Monday 16th May -> Saturday 28th May – New Zealand.  Primarily hanging in/near Angela’s house in Rotorua.  Probable day-trips (if you’re lucky) to exotic locales such as Hamilton, Hawkes Bay, Taranaki.  Probably one or two nights in Wellington at the end of this time.  If you’re lucky.
• Saturday 28th May -> Monday 30th May – Melbourne.  Not really sure – but trying to spend time with any/all people that are interested.  Open to offers of accommodation – bearing previous sentence in mind.

So, yeah – check out that itinerary, and let me know when/where you’ll be around/available – if relevant.

Back here in present (or recent past) -day London… not much happening.  As alluded to in the beginning, I’ve settled back into routine, including work.  And if anything, my holiday way back in March managed to make me more disillusioned by this whole work lark.  But that might be because of the dwindling bank balance.  My money is disappearing – which makes grand ideas of motorbike tours around Europe, train trips to North Korea, back-packer trips through central Asia – all very much pipe dreams at the moment.  I realise that I probably need much much cheaper accommodation, in order to  ‘accommodate’ such aspirations.  And was considering this the other day – but don’t think I’m quite ready to go back to living with other people just yet.  Am still loving being able to open the fridge – and knowing what everything in there is, and how old it is, and that if it’s a half-full container of soup/something – knowing perfectly well that it’s there for a reason, and will have disappeared within the day.  Such simple pleasures.

But enough of my being a hermit.  I have had one social outing – which was the last Sunday of March.  A pleasant enough day – dim-sum/yum-cha on Baker Street (home of that famous druggie Sherlock Holmes).  Followed by a few beverages at a local pub – and then everybody scattered.  All very civilised and what-not.  Hopefully we will be able to repeat this next month.  I have a vague plan of maybe alternating national foods – to make it a bit interesting.  Perhaps a Brazilian churrascaria this month – although it might need a bit of convincing for people on that latest fad diet – ‘Vegetarian’.  Not that I can talk – as I realise I am starving, and look at my lunch.  Tangerines and grapes.  What a poof.

Two weeks gone, and nothing to show for it.

Have tried to settle into a routine, but that got a little put out of shape when I broke stuff.  My attempt at cluttering my already very small apartment with a home-gym failed when I proved too strong for my cheap equipment.  But – rather than wait for replacement parts – I’ve gone and ordered new stuff.  So soon I’ll have two rowing machines in my flat.

Living like a hermit seems to have driven me to just buy stuff.  Need to get out of that.  I’ve also added to my collection of diving equipment.  ‘Cause I’m a diver.  Just need to do some diving now, so I don’t look like some kind of poseur.  As if.

And in other news – it seems like my lengthy explanation of why a fear of snakes is perfectly rational – has turned what was originally a healthy and slightly exaggerated fear of snakes into a full-blown phobia.  Although still rational.  Sort-of.  I now find it very difficult to look at a webpage or television/movie screen which features a snake.  A far cry from a couple of years ago, when I allowed one to slither over and around my arm and what-not – and actually considered buying it from the nice Venezualan man when he offered to sell it to me.

And this is why I’m refraining from further rants – regarding things like people walking slowly in the middle of footpaths, or erratically changing position on footpaths without checking behind them, or stopping at the top/bottom of stairs in order to extend their suitcase roller handles, or anything bloody else which would not be tolerated if driving – so why the hell is it when you’re a pedestrian? – because I’m afraid that if I put into writing all the reasoned arguments as to why these people are annoying – my already stronger-than-they-should-be views will evolve into murderous rages.  My heartrate is already increasing at the thought of selfish/spatially-unaware pedestrians.  I don’t need to build this up any more.  Already – despite no longer needing to join rush-hour tubes or trains to/from work – I actually try to avoid the rush-hour of pedestrians.  Not just because of the thoughtless ones – but just being part of that crowd of thousands and thousands of drones on their way to work.  So very, very depressing.  Just now – for perhaps the first time, I realise the allure of farming.  Even being shat on by a cow starts to look good by comparison.