Month: October 2009

Razorblades & Rohypnol

Kruse Leave a comment

I have come to realise that I have a problem.  Champagne.  It is a real problem – and something needs to be done.  Over the last month I have probably spent more on champagne than most people’s monthly living costs.  This can not go on forever – as on one occasion I spent more than I earn in a week – on one night of drinking champagne.  Yes – I suppose that you could consider me a hero, sacrificing myself bravely to end the global recession.  But – I think I’ve done enough now, and the news reports certainly seem to support this.  I think it’s time for a rest from being so selfless.  My one last fling was on Wednesday night.  A free bar – as it was a function celebrating my project being finished.  But – even with an open bar, I somehow managed to purchase two magnums of champagne.

Anyway – all that is in the past now.  Let us look to the future.  I seem to have somehow been talked into moving house.  When all is certain – I’ll let some of you know my new address.  However – it seems that my new place will NOT have a jacuzzi.  It will NOT be within 30 minutes commute of work.  It will NOT be 5 minutes walk from my local pub.  It will NOT have a carpeted bathroom.   It will NOT have a bidet.  Somehow I’m trading all of this for a Chook.  This is yet another recent instance which can only be explained by rohypnol.

Work, drink, work, drink, wrink, dork

Kruse Leave a comment

Apologies to the few of you who still logon once in a while to see if I’ve been doing anything interesting.  Firstly – for not writing anything for a while, and secondly – for not doing anything terrible exciting recently.

Yep – since the last time I blathered on about stuff – I worked a couple of weeks in India, and drank at night.  I believe I made a few phone calls from the hotel one night – taking advantage of the fact that I was still awake at what should be a reasonable hour in New Zealand.  Forgetting that despite being awake, I probably wasn’t in any state to make sensible conversation.

Then – back to England (for good – I don’t think I have to go to India again.  Figured I’ve spent about 20% of this year living in the Crowne Plaza Today Gurgaon).  Anyway – back to Ingerlund, where the pattern continued.  Ben is still in the area – so there has been a fair bit of the old binge-drink.  Mine old nemesis.  So – the last few weeks has been a rollercoaster of excessive drinking, excessive working, repeated ad nauseum.

Highlights include:

  • Setal & Mark’s wedding.  Congratulations to them.  Good wedding, and good craic afterwards.
  • The day after Setal’s wedding.  To the best of my knowledge, I bought 18 bottles of champagne that day – although one of them was only a mini-bottle.
  • Last Friday.  Drinks with workmates.  Well – bosses.  A very overpriced bottle of champagne which I couldn’t finish, so took back to my local.
  • Saturday.  John’n’Mel’s leaving drinks.  Drinks in a park, followed by being far far too noisy at Caro’n’Dom’s place.
  • Sunday.  Woke up with bodies strewn throughout my bedroom.  Accidentally left very long message on my boss’ voicemail.  He reckons he couldn’t hear much except bad guitar, and me yelling at somebody about my horse.  Then – went to the local – and treated Caitlin, Chook & Slab to that particular experience.  Slab stuck with me to the end. I spent most of the time working, getting progressively ‘slurrier’ on my conference calls with management-types.
  • Last night – drinks with workmates.  Supposed to be my boss’ leaving drinks – but he’s been coerced into staying a while longer too.  (I was supposed to finish last week – no such luck.)
  • Tonight – supposed to be attending some black-tie function.  It’s kind of like the Oscars, but for computer nerds.  And I’ve been invited!  (Yes – the self-disgust is nearly unbearable.)  Methinks it’s time to get boozed up and try to snatch an award off of somebody, and make a drunken speech.